Why I don’t like the term “resilience”.
In an era where resilience is often hailed as a goal of therapy, I think it’s important that we acknowledge that there can be a shadow side to “resilience”. Society often promotes the idea that being resilient means bouncing back from adversity. However, beneath the surface, lies a host of potential negative consequences of the glorification of resilience.
While resilience may offer temporary respite in times of hardship, the way that most people conceputalise resilience can mask underlying issues by emphasizing endurance rather than true healing. The societal pressure to be resilient can discourage individuals from seeking help and support, perpetuating a culture of stoicism that demands silent suffering. The pursuit of resilience can inadvertently suppress vulnerability, preventing individuals from addressing and processing their emotional pain. This repression can lead to long-lasting mental and emotional wounds that don’t actually get addressed.
I also believe that the relentless pursuit of resilience places an unfair burden on individuals, suggesting that they must overcome every obstacle single-handedly. This expectation can be particularly harmful for marginalized groups, who face systemic barriers that are often beyond their control, or in workplaces that emphasise the importance of “resilience”. By fostering a mindset that resilience alone is enough to overcome all adversity, we perpetuate a disproportionate burden of responsibility and diminish the importance of collective efforts towards creating a more equitable society, or employers responsibility for creating a safe working environment.
The glorification of resilience can inadvertently lead to a dismissal of the very human need for rest and recuperation. The constant pressure to be strong and persevere can erode an individual’s physical, mental, and emotional well-being. The resulting fatigue and burnout can undermine the very resilience that people strive to maintain, setting the stage for further setbacks and challenges.
In order to create a healthier and more balanced approach to personal growth and well-being, it is crucial to challenge the prevailing narrative of resilience. Recognizing the limitations of resilience does not undermine the importance of facing adversity, but rather emphasizes the need for a holistic approach that prioritizes self-care, vulnerability, and community support. By acknowledging our limits and seeking assistance when needed, we can foster genuine healing and build a society that embraces the full spectrum of human experiences.
Resilience can offer temporary strength in the face of adversity, however, it is essential to critically examine the idea that we relentlessly persue it. By addressing the darker aspects of resilience, we can foster a more authentic and compassionate approach to personal growth and create a society that uplifts and supports individuals in their journey towards well-being.
